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THE FAMILY CORNER
“I will walk in my house in the
integrity of my heart.”
Psalm 101:2
A Message to Fathers
Matthew 5:48: “You must be perfect--just as your Father in
heaven is perfect.”
How can we fathers do the best job
possible in raising our children? Christian fathers have a high standard to
live up to given that they (as all Christians) are admonished to act as their
Father in heaven acts towards them. Let us take some time now to talk about how
our Father acts towards us, so as to spotlight the standard of how we fathers
need to act towards our children.
Providing
Matthew
Our Father tells us not to worry about
clothing and other necessary items that we need in life. So we need to provide
our children with food and clothes. We don’t have to spoil them with an
overabundance of things, but enough to be adequately provided for, just as our
Heavenly Father provides for our needs (not
our wants).
Looking out for their interest
Matthew
This
verse implies that our Father knows what we have need of and is ready to give
it when help is requested by His children. As fathers, we need to study each of
our children in order to know what they
need in advance of their requests.
Only then will fathers be ready to give good things to their children in a
timely and wise manner.
Merciful
Luke
Sometimes we tend
to talk down to our children, especially when the pressures of life are coming
to a boil. Our Father in heaven does not treat us this way. We find abundant Grace to help in time of need. Our
children should believe that they can approach us with the same confidence in
which we approach the throne of grace.
Forgiving
Luke
We
have here the classic response as to how fathers should treat their children
when they repent of their sins. No lectures, no rebukes, no “I told you so!”
Our Father’s attitude is first compassion, then acceptance in action -- He runs
-- towards us. Then He embraces us with His whole heart, not just with partial
acceptance. No suspicion of future failures! He also is in a hurry to complete
the reconciliation between His long lost son and Himself. He provides him with
the very best clothing. How much more could He do?
We
must have this same attitude when our children stray. In order to carry this
out, there must be great anticipation of a return from sin. Why else would the
father of the parable run to meet
him. His heart is obviously with his son, even when the load of sin stands
between them. As fathers, do we have
this same attitude towards our children?
Correction
John
15:2 - “He breaks off every branch in me
that does not bear fruit, and he prunes every branch that does bear fruit, so
that it will be clean and bear more fruit.”
Just
as our Father corrects and guides us in the way that we should go, so fathers
should not be afraid to prune the unfruitful twigs that a child grows. It must
be done, but with utmost care and loving thought, so as not to damage the
entire branch.
Impartial
1
Peter 1:17 - “You call him Father, when
you pray to God, who judges all people by the same standard (impartial),
according to what each one has done; so then, spend the rest of your lives here
on earth in reverence for him.”
Too
often fathers treat their children as better than all other children. Their
children can do no wrong. This is not a reflection of our Father above. He judges all by the same standard
whether they
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are His children or not. Fathers
must show their children that there is only one standard of right to live by.
It is this standard that shows them consistency in life and that all others are
of equal importance. Otherwise, pride will go before the fall. This is often
seen at sporting events in which children participate; parents are often
partial in their judgments and do not reflect our Father’s single standard of
judgment.
Consistency
Matthew 5:37 - “Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your
‘No,’ ‘No;’ anything beyond this comes from the evil one.”
Perhaps
the most important trait a Father can show is consistency. Children must know that their father’s responses will
be the same over time. If a response is one thing one day and another the next,
how can children trust their father’s judgment? Our Father is never changing.
We know exactly what we can expect because His word does not return unto Him
void. As fathers, we must reflect our Father’s consistency as well. Nothing is
more important to a child’s development than having a father whose guidance and
direction doesn’t change with the blowing of this world’s winds. A word of
caution: If we find we have made a wrong
decision, we should not be hesitant to say we were wrong, explain why, and
apologize.
Summary
Being
a godly father is not easy. But it is one of the most important roles in
bringing our children to an understanding of their real Father in heaven. We must be role models
of Him. What better witness to our children than how we act and who we are.
Words that are inconsistent with actions tell our children that we really don’t
believe our Father’s Words. We need to show them by example how to live a godly
life, rather than preach them sermons that do not agree with how we live.
Andy Weeks
“I’d rather
see a sermon than hear one any day; I’d
rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way, the eye is a better
pupil and more willing than the ear, fine counsel is confusing, but example is
always clear; and the best of all the preachers are the men who live their
creeds, for to see good put in action is what everybody needs.”
From: Sermons We See by Edgar A. Guest